After the Kiss
("Orphans")

Lynn Wright

As she drew away, ending the kiss, his eyes remained closed for a long moment. Then, he spoke, his voice a hoarse whisper, without opening his eyes.

"Catherine. You must not do that. You must not…." He threw his head back. "Go…please. Go!"

"I…I’m sorry if I upset you. I just…" She stopped, momentarily confused.

"No, Catherine…I…you didn’t do anything wrong, but I…" He stopped.

She realized suddenly what the problem might be. "I think I understand. It’s hard for you when I’m Below...because…"

He raised his hand quickly and laid his fingers across her mouth for just an instant. "Don’t say it. Don’t."

She reached up slowly and put her hands on his shoulders. He was still looking away from her. "I’m so grateful for your help. I don’t know what I’d have done without this place to come to for healing. And I know it’s been hard for you, having me down here with you. But, Vincent, ‘Don’t say it’?" She smiled a little. "Will that make it go away?"

She paused, waiting patiently until he looked down at her, and when he finally lowered his gaze she spoke seriously. "I know what you feel. Did you think you could hide that from me?"

"Catherine…please. I am not able to…" He paused, swinging his head from side to side, unable to articulate his feelings without going to the very place he was trying to avoid.

"You don’t have to tell me. I know what the problem is. But is it such a problem? I think you’re making it more than it is. If I weren’t willing…but I am. I’m willing, Vincent. I’m…eager."

He threw his head back again, turning away as he did so. "Don’t…oh, don’t!"

"I know this is upsetting for you, but I need to tell you. This is very important to me also, you know."

His body stilled at her words. He didn’t move at all for a long moment, then his head came down slowly, and he turned back to her. He studied her face, looking deeply into her eyes. "Yes. I see. It is important to you. I don’t think I realized how important. I thought… that it was just a moment’s wish for…comfort, in your chamber. " He backed away slowly. "I must think about this. I need time…"

“All right. I can understand that...I’ll see you, we’ll...talk…later, OK?” She smiled gently at him, and turned away for the entrance to her apartment. Just before she climbed the ladder she turned again, smiling at him from the shaft of light. “Later, Vincent.”

The End